Knowing When to Say Sorry

Saying sorry is important, but often times it’s unnecessary. We say it because it’s become synonymous with being sympathetic and not accepting the responsibility of an error. It also means that we shouldn’t apologize for who we are and where we are going with our lives. The goal is to be conscious of the fact that because we are unapologetic, we don’t want to be the cause of excess collateral damage.

Often times we apologize for our actions, both right and wrong. Apologizing for the wrong actions is always necessary. We apologize when we hurt other people (regardless of intention) and when the fault is yours. Knowing when to apologize is just as important as the apology itself. The sincerity of your apology not only builds your character, but it’s the essential step in realizing you may be off course.

Apologizing for the right actions is a disservice to yourself. It’s an automatic response to the feedback we receive from others to excuse our behavior even when we know it’s the best decision for us and our dreams. We haven’t failed anybody or ourselves, so there’s no need to apologize for doing what’s right. Remember, the decision that you have made is coming from within you, your authentic self. It’s the subconscious coming through to you to materialize the visualizations that you’ve created. Take a look at your log: does this decision or step take me closer to what I want? If it does, then the apology serves as a deviating step from what you want. A 1% deviation from your authentic self and purpose is not acceptable.

Tim Tebow is unapologetic about his actions because it would compromise who he is.

It’s also important to remember to say “Thank You” regardless of an apology. When we thank somebody when we do apologize, it’s for their feedback and accepting our apology. It’s equally important to thank somebody when you’re not sorry because while you may not agree with their feedback, they still took the time and effort to offer their thoughts. They care about you and that’s worth the appreciation. Take the time to explain to them why you are doing what you’re doing.

Being conscientious of the people around you shows that while you’re strong in your convictions about what you want in life, you won’t take the people around you for granted or take advantage of them. They may not agree with you on your path, but that doesn’t mean you should compromise who you are. Keep in mind that you are also not responsible for the personal responses people have about something that you did. The best response is to not apologize, but emphasize that you regret their response to your decision.

What apologies have you made that are unnecessary? Let me hear from you! Leave a comment below and follow me on Twitter @alexdbarba!


Puss in Boots



One thought on “Knowing When to Say Sorry

  1. teddy

    Good one, to many people do that and it simply means nothing because they really are not sorry. We are who we are and we should be ok with; what we do, and think reguardless of how other people take it. We may not always be able to consider their feelings when we are making decissions about and for ourselves.

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